“LITTLE” JOE Shoots in the mid-70’s to Win

He is now the leader in most fairway hits, greens in regulation, and lowest average putts in a round! With his consistency and scoring binge, LITTLE JOE has surpassed CHANG HJ and is fast closing in on DAVID’s lowest held handicap record.

However, there is a monster lurking around the corner. He rips the ball off the tee 275-300 yards; muscles a 9 iron to 150 yards just like Steve Stricker; chips like Kevin Na; and putts like Jordan Speith. On the 9th hole where MARIO had to chip and putt for a double-bogey, JOHN pumped his fist for his birdie! With such attributes and a humongous index, it would be tough to win against JOHN “Stricker-Na-Speith”.

TOUR #3 Kings Links WINNERS

1st place – JOE (3rd from the left)
2nd place – JOHN (2nd from the left)
tied for 3rd – ERNIE & DANNY (rightmost & leftmost)
WINNERS#4JOE now occupies the 2014 leaderboard with two 1st place wins (Tour #1 and #3). DANNY ranks 2nd with his Tour #2 win and Tour #3 tie for third. JOHN and DAVID are tied for third, while EL KAPITAN is in 4th place. MARIO is in 5th place with his 3rd place win at Tour #1.

SIMON our handicap maestro and mafioso mullah collector promised to soon publish an official UPS 2014 TOUR RANKING.

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TRAGIC MISHAP ON
COURSE

The 2nd group on the course last Thursday had to call in for someone to bring a golf cart ambulance to the 7th hole to attend to KING KONG. After extricating his ball in thick rough left of the fairway from an errant drive, HARRY collapsed in great pain and could hardly get up. His playing companions getting ready for their own turn to make a shot further up noticed his difficulty and immediately made a call to the proshop.  Everyone was concerned when they carted him off the golf course evidently in great distress.

Apparently, he suffered some kind of muscle pain but thankfully, we were informed that he was able to drive himself home.

After investigating the event, someone on the course apparently saw what had happened and sent us this picture, explaining the cause of the pain:

BAD GOLF SHOTI guess it doesn’t pay to get “this frustrated” after a bad shot – causes severe leg pain! Apparently, when he learned about the incident, Bill was extremely worried.

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While Annie could not contain herself:

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But now that we know what had happened, let us wish KING KONG a speedy return to golf. Meanwhile, JOHN was suspicious about the whole thing.

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It appears that KING KONG is quick to recover from the mishap and promises to set the course on fire this coming Thursday at PEACE PORTAL.

No, no, no, he is not bringing a torch gun to the course!

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